California II
Ride til I Die - Part 2 of 4
“Hell’s Furnace”, that seems dramatic. Well the rock wall on the left side of us reflects the sun’s rays into the canyon and off the asphalt this road happened to be on, which increased the temperature at least 10 degrees. Hence the name, “hell’s furnace”. Also, if you hoped for a breeze to cool you off, it would only come from the west, the very direction we were heading. Any momentum would be halted by the very thing you longed for. I continued on with one high expectation, more downhill than uphill. Nevertheless, my expectation was wrong because this section was in fact mostly uphill, and every downhill was met with a gust of wind that lead to a slow and eventual stop. Half way through this 10-mile stretch, I found no more hopes or naive thoughts but only the truth of my condition. I was dehydrated, physically exhausted, and mentally spent. I somehow reached the end of the properly named “Hell’s Furnace" by walking me and my bike to a shaded area where everyone else was gathered. Each person being in the same state as I was or had become a self-appointed cheerleader, which only reminded me with each “YOU CAN DO IT!” of how unprepared I was for this trip.
If any bystander thought the road called “Hell’s Furnace” hadn’t lived up to the hype, imagine the crowd of thirty people sprawled across a small shaded area off the side of a public road. I found my spot amidst the vomiting and heavy mouth breathing and laid down to catch my breathe. Yet as I laid there, I felt my body begin to cool…and not in a good way. For my body was depleted and made the decision (mind you, without my consent) to move the blood from my extremities to my heart to hydrate my vitals; therefore, making myself feel cold on a day that was nearing 100 degrees Fahrenheit. My vision became blurred, and I had lost all will to continue. Yet despite my raised white flag, I discovered we had “only” fifteen miles left to go.
Fully aware of my limitations, I made the decision to end my day lying down in the back of a moderately air-conditioned van. As I summoned the strength to walk to the van. I felt eyes on me and looked up and saw disappointment from the young men that might of thought I was “more man” than I actually was. Fear of people can be a powerful thing; however, more times than not, that power is used to intimidate and humiliate us. It is spawned out of assumptions more than reality. Meaning the place where I make decisions from is according to how I “assume” you think about me and my actions. Every person deals with this at some point in their life, to make a decision in reality or the perceived reality of others.
Our decision making can be retrained with our value on failure. Yet in most people, the pressures are too great because life is easier through the perceptions of others. But to think we appear weak or inadequate is a dangerous slope. This is where evaluation shapes our decision making and we grow from our failure.
Like me in this situation, there are many factors that can contribute to making the wrong decision. I could worry what others are thinking in moment and can easily lose sight of my current priorities. At this point, I was on the verge of a heat stroke and my priorities were health and hydration. Therefore, I had one decision to make: put my bike on the truck and find a van to ride in for the rest of the day. In hindsight, my decision to “live to fight another day” is what turned this painful two-day experience into a positive one.
As I walked back to the van to find a place to recover, I saw the looks on certain people’s faces with very little compassion for my situation. Even though, I knew what their words and the eyes meant, their disappointment was not greater than my own. I could take on their disappointment which would lead me to drown in self-pity, or just take on my own and recover for tomorrow. I spent the evening rehydrating by soaking my body in the cold river water, eating a heavy meal, and filling myself with gallons of water. Because the next day would be different…hopefully.
To be continued...
